Dating versus boyfriend

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Remember, that’s the biggest problem – you’ve seen it all over this blog: “Men only text! This advice is ONLY for women who are SICK of sleeping with men and feeling like crap afterward because they don’t know where they stand. “What I want to challenge you on is this notion that women ought to be bartering sex for commitment.” I would like to challenge that notion, too.Because my clients who hold out for commitment are not bartering sex for commitment.

Now I know that writing this is not going to change a thing. First of all, here was the premise of my original post: “You want to find out if a man is serious about you? If you don’t – because you’re a liberated woman who can have sex whenever you damn well please – don’t be too surprised if a decent percentage of those men never call again.

But it does do one thing: it ensures that the guy you just slept with is not seeing anybody else and is seriously open to exploring a future. “This is why so many feel “used” because they waited a month, or two, or three and finally “gave in” and POOF he’s gone anyways.” I didn’t say that you should wait a month or two or three before “giving in”.

(Unless, of course, he’s a psycho who would lie to your face to get laid – and I’m suggesting most normal men would rather find another woman than to do that.) “There is a shaming of women for wanting to have sex.” From whom? As I said in my original post, “I’m not remotely judgmental of those who have sex without commitment.” Hell, I’ve had a lot of sex without commitment. Waiting for some arbitrary time period has never been the point.

“Best thing is to remove expectations so you will never get hurt.” As a dating coach, I spend a lot of time managing women’s expectations and trying to ensure they’re realistic.

If you expect to fall in love in 30 days on Match, you’ll be disappointed.

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