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“Part of the reason this has been so hard for me is that I have so much of my identity tied up in these books.It’s what I’m known for,” Harris told me recently from Vancouver, British Columbia, where he moved his family last year to enroll in a graduate program at evangelical Regent College.It inspired both praise—from the likes of purity matriarch Elisabeth Elliot and Focus on the Family—and book-length rebuttals.Harris was already a popular speaker at conferences for Christian home-schoolers and had started his own magazine, but the book’s influence quickly outpaced its modest built-in audience—it has sold more than 1.2 million copies to date. You weren’t just not having sex, you were adopting “a revolutionary pattern of living” that would make you both a better Christian and, someday, a better spouse.So far he has received more than 300 submissions, ranging from reflective to raw.In the fall, he hopes to embark on an independent study in which he’ll read about the religious culture that informed him as a young man.It was even better not to even kiss before you got to the altar, Harris suggested, and beware of “emotional hookups,” too.

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” It was an excuse to talk about sex and imagine we were really talking about God.Books like Dianna Anderson’s (both released last year) have revisited the effects of 1990s purity culture through the stories of people who lived through it.Harris’ recent public wrestling with his own work has spurred a new round of criticism from people who have been psychologically and spiritually hurt, some of whom now feel alienated from the church as a whole.Over the years he wrote more books about dating and marriage, including , he is the father of three kids—two of them teenagers—and he is pursuing formal education for the first time in his life.And these days, he’s having very mixed feelings about the book that turned him into a Christian celebrity.

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